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“I’m a very classic middle child in that regard. I’ve done a lot of therapy, and I’ve done Al-Anon — I’ve done all the work, and that’s what makes me like Katie, because then I come in and give everybody advice.”

In addition to therapy, you and your husband might benefit from Al-Anon meetings.

Panelists replied with resources including Al-Anon, a support group for relatives and friends of people with addiction.

I am planning to attend my first Al-Anon meeting this evening.

And you’ve already gotten yourself partway through the hardest thing by seeing the uncomfortable feelings as a to-do list, then lining up a trip to Al-Anon.