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The problem is, in true EastEnders fashion, the under-threat fellas have been a right bunch of rotters towards the women of the Square.

Mirror Group's barrister, Andrew Green KC, accepted there were some investigators who broke the law - "rotters" as he called them several times.

Prince Harry's barrister David Sherborne criticised Mr Green for repeatedly describing private investigators who had been convicted of criminal offences as "rotters".

Some of that is embodied by accomplished performers — Danny Huston is always good as an eloquent rotter — but there isn’t much intrigue or conviction.

As everyone who’s hunted or cultivated oyster mushrooms knows, they are wood rotters that are among the first creatures to take a crack at dead trees.